Mothers Have Needs Too!

Allison Gilbert, LMFT, Santa Cruz Counselor Lic: MFC 24087

Have a Higher Purpose

Daily Grind
Motherhood, especially in the first few months and longer (!) can be a 24/7 daily grind.  Cleaning up spills and toys, changing clothing moments after putting them on, waking up all night with a sick baby when you're sick too...  Sometimes motherhood is just repetitive, menial labor that you wouldn't choose to do even if you got paid for it.

Higher Purpose
When mothering gets you down, try remembering your higher purpose.  Some people define "higher purpose" through a spiritual or religious orientation.  Others define it through their values and what creates meaning in their lives.  Either way, a higher purpose can help you remember the greater good you're serving by caring for children.

Finding Your Purpose
It might have been easier for you to recognize the greater good or higher purpose you were serving in your career.  Your purpose was probably related to your unique gifts and talents.  Did you feel called by the "Universe" to perform a specific function in the grand scheme of things based on your unique talents and skills?  Or did you have the sense you were born into this world for a specific reason that only you could fulfill?

There Are No Mistakes
Truthfully, your work as a mother isn't any different from your work in a career.  You're being called to do a job that only you can do.  You were given gifts and talents that are perfect for the children you got.  None of it was a mistake.  You're being required right now to serve the world through the raising of children. 

So begin to ask yourself, "What is that 'greater good' I'm contributing to by caring for my children at this very moment on our planet?"  The answer to this question is your "higher purpose".

Personal Development
When you have a higher purpose for mothering, life goes more smoothly.  When you know you're serving a grander scheme, then the difficult parts of the job become great lessons for the development of your soul.  You are growing and changing and becoming a better human being through this job of yours.  Daily monotonous tasks become part of a larger whole, stretching out in time before you.  You realize you're meant to be doing whatever you're doing, as menial as it feels at times, because it furthers the greater good.  You will thrive when you have a higher purpose.

2007 Allison Gilbert, M.A., L.M.F.T.; Free Tips

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There is no more important work than the job of nurturing children.

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 "Allison, you were a lifesaver. I hope you don't mind my rhapsodizing about your help, but I am still incredibly grateful to you for helping our family in our time of need, and so I will continue boasting about how awesome you are to just about anyone who will listen."-Mother of a preschooler and a newborn

"Thanks for everything. You have been such a great  help! My husband told me that he thinks this is the best we have ever done."  -Mother of a preschooler and a toddler

"I love getting your emails, Allison!  Keep up the great work!" -Mother of elementary school children, who also owns an online business